Been a while, but we're back with a vengence :D

Jessi was on her swing the other day every time there was a pause in the rain. Surprised she didn't get a wet bottom!! But at one stage nanna came to get her and as she skipped across the lawn to get to the car I saw something move. I called her back and we found this little guy resting on some long blades of grass. He didn't like our observations very much as he moved a few times. Shania was here too and I think she was more surprised to see such a little frog than Jessi. We see frogs every now and again when it is raining but I guess Stace keeps Shania tucked up inside when it is wet. Ah.. whatever! Wet or dry you need to just enjoy the day. I am glad we got to make a new friend in this lil guy, he was so small! Only maybe 4cm long. I have no idea what kind of frog it is but I'd be guessing some kind of common garden frog as we don't have a pond or anything to draw them in so he'd need another reason to be here. Safe travels my lil amphibian friend. Come to visit again soon. We do so enjoy watching you.

My first scrapbook page in I couldn't tell you how long. Since well before christmas! I am not overly impressed with it. I don't know why I don't like it or what I think it needs. But I wont do any more to it, I know I will fully destroy it. I am always trying to remind myself that as much as scrapping is a creative outlet for me, it really is about the story I tell for those to come after me. So.. the story is told so leave alone! *lol* Round seems to be very "in" within my scrapping mags so I gave it ago. Been there, done that and am over it already *lol* It's a nice photo of Jessi and it's very hard for me to scrap those non-gorgeous full frontal photos. So this in itself was an achievement! The photo is Jessi playing in a cubbyhouse at playgroup, dressed as a fairy for a little friends birthday party. My Feral Fairy!

My second page in as many days. I am much happier with this one. I knew what I had in mind right from the onset. So imagine my disgust when I misplaced the letter S stamp!!!! I sat for hours on and off trying to work out what to do bt not getting anywhere as I had planned to do it just like this! Last night I was looking at some papers that came free with a mag and voila! There was the cheeky lil letter S. This is my first effort with foam stamps, acrylic paint, ink and dry brush painting. I am pleased with how it all came together. The second photo being included was a last minute.. "hmm it needs something". The tulle through the ribbon letters spelling ballerina is interesting. I had no ribbon the right colours and didn't know how I was going to attach them to the page. I stumbled across some white tulle and it really fit with how the white acrylic paint was somewhat translucent and the tulle has that effect with it not being a "full" fabric. I like it. The tulle fits the whole ballerina thing to! That only just hit me *lol* Yeah.. I'm a dope :P This photo was taken the day we bought Jessi her very sweet little tutu for $15 at Gosnells Railway Markets in Perth. We drove to my great-uncle's to see my great-grandfather and Jessi wanted it on "now!" *lol*. This was July 06. Needless to say that tutu is nearly worn out now! She has even worn it in winter with stockings underneath.

My test page for the letter stamping. Notice how the S is missing? :P I really like this piece of paper. Bright and fun. The butterfly is yellow but I was using the brush I dry brushed black paint on the ballerina layout so the black has come off a lil with the yellow (nah, I hadn't washed the brush). Looks good. What will I do with this paper? Who knows. Maybe it is time I started an A4 album for.. I dunno. Just cos. Maybe for her dad if he ever wants to know about his daughter.

I found this little business card holder in the newsagency yesterday. When I saw them I automatically said "I can use that!" and bought 3 of them. Only $1 something each! I decided to try doing mini cards. I've only done one (which you see, the others are just cut out ready to use) but I am just not sure what to do with it. I might make a little "I love you" box for my sister. I find I need a goal to really get stuck into it. The other 2 I am thinking maybe little accordian albums. Who knows what this twisted lil mind of mine will come up with. I will be sure to share ;) Incase anyone is interested, this bus-card holder is about 9.5cm long x 6cm high

How proud am I of my little princess!!! This is Jessica's FIRST EVER scrapbook page! The photo is my sisters cat Shadow when she had kittens (yes, Shadow is a ginger cat. she was named Shadow as she followed my brother in aw everywhere when she was little, not her colouring). I gave Jessa the photo and asked her what colour paper she wanted. She did start with a white piece that had black pawprints on but she just hacked at it with decorative scissors. I thought she was going to use those cut pieces on the page but I guess not! I made some suggestions of things she could stick and she just did what she pleased. She actually got pretty grumpy at me for writing the title on the page as she wanted the stickers to spell it. Unfortunately they were cheap stickers and bits tore off as I tried to remove them from the backing!

These are Jess's following attempts at scrapbooking. The red one, her and her dad, was all her own doing. See how she has grouped all the hearts, stars and flowers together respectively? She is rather methodical like that. Ever since she was really little. I remember when she was only maybe 10mths old we were playing with her wooden blocks (I was making towers and she was knocking them down! *lol*) and she would hold either two cylindrical ones or put two cone shaped ones together. She likes grouping things. Anyway, that was off track! Jess was getting rather bored with the scrapbooking thing. She and Shania were both doing it. I will need to borrow Shania's 4 complete pages to photograph. For a 9yr old she totally amazed me!! She has such creativity and a real "idea" of what she wants to do. I help buy cutting the paper for her and such and making the odd suggestion, but I try to let the girls do it themselves otherwise. It isn't theirs if I do it all! Shania was also very pleased with herself and beaming when she took her pages home to show her mum. I promise pics as soon as I can. You will be stunned at what that clever little cousin of mine achieved.

It's school holidays here and I have been a lil inundated with kids. Shania has slept over, but it all started by nanna needing to do something so leaving Shania and Jessi here, then Nichola coming to see me and Kristina wanting to stay with the girls. So the 4 of us squished into my totally trashed craft room and piled the table high with Jessica's crafty bits. We put heaps into these "chinese take out" containers mum bought that somehow made their way to my place. With everything in its place they were able to just grab what they were after. We made peg dolls and popstick boxes, giraffes with paddlepop sticks and foam balls and decorated cardboard cut outs. Those you see above are all Jessi's. The 2 older girls took all their things home with them. I am so proud of Jessi's flower. She did it ALL BY HERSELF. I mean all of it. Shania and I were busy doing something and Jess says "look"and held up the flower. It looks amazing. Well done my lil princess. You have really shocked your mummy this week.

My very first attempt at broomstick lace. A small scarf suitable for a little girl. Little did I realise I was supposed to use back-loop-only throughout to this is not right!! I was pulling through both loops. It curls up at the edges. I actually rather like the "shells" this has created on the back though.

My second attempt. No curling, yay! This is supposed to be a birthday gift for my lifelong friend Helen. It is well and truly late as her bday was April 1st and now I am not sure if she will ever get it. But it's better in that I did it right this time *lol*

Last but not least the 2 squares from the Leisure Arts leaflet Dragonflies, Butterflies and More for the dragonfly afghan. I haven't done their wings. No idea what I will do with these squares. I really only made them just for the hell of it. The colours don't go together at all but hey! I don't mind. I might make a little pillow for Shania.


On the personal front everything is crap. My car wont even start now. I need my car. How am I supposed to get Jess to school when it is raining? We don't have buses or taxi's or even a school bus. Jessica has been on antibiotics as she had a REALLY nasty infection on her hand. This was 2 weeks ago but it seems overnight her hand is infected again :( Our dr called to get authorisation for Jessi's Singulair asthma preventer tablet during the week and was deined as she uses a Flixotide puffer as well and apparently you aren't allowed to use both. Yet she has used both ever since she was diagnosed! She had 4 asthma attacks on Thurs night and yet some idiot on the end of the phone feels they have the right to tell us "no, she can't have that medication" cos some bigger idiot who likely has their own gvt office somewhere has decided that you should be able to keep asthma under control with just one preventer. Dr said to go back next week and when they ask if she is using an inhaler too he will tell them no. Well.. we shall see.

I've been pretty miserable. Spent hours on the phone to nanna just crying last night. I know I am not well and I am doing what I can about that. But our finances wont fix themselves and my daughter wont just become healthy. Nor will someone decide to love me. So.. very little will change no matter what happens. At the end of the day when Jessi is in bed and I am allowed to be "Michelle" and not "Jessi's mum" I would love to have someone to talk to, someone to hold and hold me, someone to help so I don't have to get up to my 4yr old 4 times a night! Until I get myself sorted out I know I don't deserve to have that, but that is what I want. I am fed up with all the promises I hear and no one but me ever makes the effort. I don't want to force someone to love me. Why can't I be loved for who I am?